Mindful Mortality Rob Spencer MD laughing in the face of death and dying jokes

Fred was in the hospital, near death. The family called their preacher to stand with them.

As the preacher stood next to the bed, Ol’ Fred’s condition appeared to deteriorate and he motioned frantically for something to write on.

The pastor lovingly handed him a pen and a piece of paper, and Ol’ Fred used his last bit of energy to scribble a note, then he died.

The preacher thought it best not to look at the note at that time, so he placed it in his jacket pocket and attended to the grieving family.

At the funeral, as he was finishing the eulogy, he realized that he was wearing the same jacket that he was wearing when Ol’ Fred died. He said, “You know, Ol’ Fred handed me a note just before he died. I haven’t looked at it, but knowing Fred, I’m sure there’s a word of inspiration there for us all.”

He opened the note, and read, “Hey, you’re standing on my oxygen tube!”

Mindful Mortality Rob Spencer MD laughing in the face of death and dying jokes

In a small town, there were two brothers who, over the course of many years, cheated, swindled, robbed and generally stole from everyone that they ever did business with.

The entire town and surrounding community reviled and despised these two brothers, as everyone was aware of just how disreputable and dishonest they were.

One day, one of the brothers mysteriously died.

Although they had never attended church, the one remaining brother went to the local pastor and offered vast sums of money if he would come to the funeral and say the appropriate words, AND, a large bonus, but ONLY if he would – during the course of the eulogy -refer to his brother as “a Saint.”

The pastor was troubled by the request, however, it was a very poor church and the church desperately needed repairs.

The Parishioners had heard about the pastor’s dilemma and were curious as to what he would do.

The service began, the church was packed, and the pastor started with the usual prayers, rites and traditions of a funeral. In closing, after referring to the deceased, he paused and turned to face the remaining brother.

He began, “As you all know, the departed was an awful individual who robbed, cheated, swindled and stole from everyone who did business with him.  However, compared to his brother, he was a Saint!”